Too distracted this morning.

I don’t have anything new or interesting to say this morning. I feel a little consumed with life at the moment, but all of it good.

I am going to share an entry from last year, written on my myspace blog.

[21 Oct 2008 | Tuesday] 1:15 AM
I would pack my bags…
“…just to stay in the corner of your heart”

I must admit, the music I am listening to has prompted this entry. It is neither sad nor happy, it just is…and maybe my best moments come out of times like these.

These musical times. My apartment is flowing with beautiful music.

The worst feeling in the world (for me anyway) is not being able to put things into words. I am extremely expressive and need to visualize things before I say them or type them, so my frustration is intense when I can’t do either. Like now.

What’s missing. What’s missing in my life are those memories that keep coming back to me, the ones that won’t let up and give way…the ones I know I’m better off without, but just want to revisit for a minute.

I don’t make friends easily, and I definitely don’t love easily; I want my best friends back, the ones I loved and the ones that loved me in return. Why is that my only regret about moving to Washington? Out of everything that’s happened since coming here, my only regret is leaving them behind. Forever.

Time doesn’t heal everything. Distance really is one of the hardest things for friendships and relationships to endure, and the evolution of a person never stops.

Yes. That single piece of knowledge makes me wonderfully happy, secure, proud, and very very sad all at once. The evolution of a person never stops.

My only regret. I am blessed beyond what I ever thought possible, but having best friends (best friends) is a blessing that nobody should take for granted. I know I never will.

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